Let me get straight to the point. I don't really enjoy social networks. Mostly, it's me, but some of it is social networks in general. Here are the reasons why:
1. They don't actually make me more social. The things I want to say don't fit into the terse format expected of tweets and status updates. This means I rarely update my status. That's part of the reason I'm blogging. I like to take the time to express my thoughts. Given the chance I'll prattle on and on and you get the idea. Well does my wife understand this. She puts up with a lot of postulating and expounding. Now that you're reading my blog so do you. Congratulations or condolences, whichever is appropriate.
2. Seeing what people are doing doesn't make me feel like I'm a part of their lives. In fact, it does the exact opposite. It makes me feel like I'm not apart of their life. Here's all the fun stuff they are doing without me. I'm glad when things are going well for my facebook friends, but it accentuates how little they are doing with me. The only exception to this is when people tag me in their posts, because they are sharing something that made them think of me specifically. Even so, part of me misses the joy of sharing those moments together. I like gathering with my friends and seeing the look on their faces as I share humorous quotes, movies, or pictures. It's so much more satisfying than a "Like" and generally more sincere.
3. I just don't care about selfies. There are so many pictures taken now that cameras are everywhere. Way too many are self portraits. They are definitely not "Kodak Moments", but just an obnoxious desire to document our faces. Social networks aren't making people social; they are exacerbating our narcisstic tendencies in a bad way.
4. I want to talk to you. I don't find interacting with people through status updates and comment sections engaging. It takes too long. I want to talk to my friends. Most of the interaction I have on Facebook is through the chat feature. I often wonder if the chat feature on Facebook is under-utilized. It's one of the better ways on the site to actually be social. And, you don't have to put your conversation out there for the entire world to see. I'm not saying you have anything to hide, but I don't publish my phone conversations. If you ever see that I'm online, feel free to say hi via chat. It's what I'm there for.
5. It is time-consuming. I spend too much time on Facebook finding out what is going on with people I care less about. It needed to be said. I don't care about most of the people I'm friends with, and my friend list is actually fairly small. Honestly, the people who know what's going on in my life don't find out through Facebook. They get it direct from the source: me. I prefer my friends to do the same. My personal opinion is that, by and large, Facebook and other social networks are for secondary friends. The people who care about you the most don't let you find out about their wedding, baby, graduation, etc. via Facebook. You hear it from them first-hand. Facebook is for everyone else. So why am I spending time on relationships with "everyone else" when I would rather strengthen those small key relationships.
6. SPAM. For a long time people would complain about forwards and junk e-mail filling their inboxes. We still have the exam same content, but now it is being passed around endlessly on Facebook. What we didn't want to put up with in our inboxes we readily accept in our timelines. It's a travesty. Plus, amidst the spam we have an endless supply of game invites and diatribes. Why do we bother?
I'm sure there are other reasons that I'm not thinking of, but they don't come to mind. Do I think Facebook is bad? Not as a tool. I think the real problem is in how we use it. We are trying to be too connected to too many people and it is having a negative impact. It has gotten to the point where not engaging this lesser form of sociality has created negative impacts on esteem. Crazy. I'm about ready to deactivate my account.
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